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Harmful advice does not need to be composed, it is enough to describe what people do. And get a ready, so to speak, recipe and– so believes psychologist Elizaveta Filonenko, the author of this publication.
If the right recipes are largely just an assumption, unknown how they work (which, incidentally, remains in the shadows when reading psychological advice), the “harmful” advice has proven to be effective in the field. So they can safely apply without fear of the result, it will come by all means, especially if you are persistent and accurate.

How to raise inattentive children

1. Try not to overburden the child. Physical and intellectual stress is very harmful to children. Overload a child can be anything, then you need to be careful, because today’s children are so tired! School, homework, clubs, examples of consonants, the road there and back… Try even before the onset of fatigue notice its ominous signs and offer your child to rest. Lack of significant load is the key to the fact that the child’s head and body and soul will work in a light mode, half-heartedly.

Never forget that kids are especially tired at school, and their homework and multiplication sets worksheets just gets them through. So often aloud pity the child about this, so he did not doubt that he was on the verge of exhaustion. It also does not hurt to mention more often how tired you personally are, helping your child do their homework.

Tactics to limit your child’s efforts is basic, although at first glance it has nothing to do with attention. But the habit of acting in a simplified mode is doing its job, and gradually the child’s brain becomes more and more inert, and is not overloaded by the need to concentrate on complex tasks. And this is a great basis for future absent-mindedness and inattention. Also, the belief that life is hard will help the child look for rest and relaxation all the time, and in this condition there is no need for attentiveness.

2. Try to protect your child in everything and never let him or her get into trouble for his or her inattention. Throw yourself to the rescue in case of any slip-up, after all, it is your child! Forgot his textbook at home – fly to school; poorly packs his bag – be on duty, pack it yourself (at least check it carefully); gets distracted when doing homework – sit next to him; forgot what he got – dive into the parent forum; does not remember about the uniform – well, what about mom? Try not to miss even the little things, in everything set up his reliable shoulder. Yes, your child is terribly absent-minded, but you can not allow it to suffer from this! He should suffer only from your admonitions, but not from the real trouble associated with inattention.

If you already missed something, the child got in trouble (the form there forgot, something unlearned, lost a library book) try to correct the situation as soon as possible. Personally go to the teacher, at the very least write him a message. Assure him that “we will fix everything”, justify yourself, you can also express your indignation at the poor organization of notifications from the school. The main thing is not to make the child himself explain and blush for his blunders!

Tactics “insurance” should be mastered perfectly, if you want to achieve really good results and raise a child who is almost unable to take care of themselves.

Do not believe those who tell you that it is your excessive activity and is the cause of negligence of the child, this can not be!

3 Don’t trust your child with serious affairs and don’t give him/her responsible assignments. Use phrases more often:
“Give it to me, or you will lose it!”
“You can’t be trusted with anything!”
“Go away, I’ll do it myself!”
“Don’t do it without me!”

It is advisable not to give your child money, more or less valuable items, tickets, anything at all that requires attention and responsibility. Also, do not trust him in any way to check the schedule, find out the schedules of places you are going to visit, do not force him to remember his own schedule of school and extracurricular activities. There are parents for all these things, at least electronic devices, you don’t need to strain the child’s head.

4. It is better if the child watches as many videos and plays computer games as possible. All novelties. When else to allow yourself, as not in childhood!
Do not limit your child. First of all, it’s hard and it’s a constant struggle, and you’re already tired. Secondly, it has not yet been proven that it is very harmful to the psyche of the child. And then, this is a new generation, their brains already work differently, they are “OTHER”. And most importantly, remember that “now they are all watching,” so is it worth straining yourself, a child to distract from video?

5. Do not burden your child with housework and self-care. He also studies, he is already short of time! Plus drama club. Do not distract your child from school and clubs with little things like going to the store, taking care of his belongings, cleaning and cooking. Absolutely all of these things develop attention to detail, organization, grounded person, and you do not need it. Inattentive people grow up in an environment where they don’t have to do much, attention is born where there’s room and work for it. And we do not need it to grow inattentive.

Where there is no way to remove the self-service, try to simplify the task as much as possible. Forget even the word laces, children can not cope with them! Only Velcro! But in general, a good parent will find a way to infiltrate with their help, even through the barrier cordons of the police.

6. If you give your child a part of responsibility, it should be responsibility only for himself. Let him clean only his own plate, wash the floor only in his room, iron his own shirt. After all, the child does not owe you or the family anything, so let him concentrate on himself, it’s better that way. Again, because, as we remember, he did not ask you to give birth to himself, and the responsibility to the family he should not have.

A person’s level of mindfulness and awareness is greatly increased when he is responsible for someone other than himself. Real absent-mindedness and inattention only thrive where that responsibility is absent.

7. Absolutely everything is better taught to the child in a playful way (preferably lying down). Avoid inducing the child to make conscious efforts (including disciplinary ones), it will immediately extinguish the child’s creativity and natural motivation.
The desire to do only what you want is an important component, it should not be neglected!

Observing these simple rules, creatively supplementing them, you will definitely raise a distracted and inattentive child. Proven by practice!